HOLLYWOOD STREET COLLAPSE BROUGHT APPLAUSE FOR COLUMNIST

HELLO AMERICA!  Of course, you must realize by now how much I enjoy revealing the happenings of my, sometimes, insane entertainment of Hollywood each day. So, sit back and try to visualize my most current Tinseltown experience. Two days ago, I woke up feeling a bit dazed. My bedroom looked strangely fuzzy as if I were in a different place. I managed to put a robe on and weakly got to the shower believing that would most certainly make a difference in how I felt.  It seemed to work, so much so, I decided to do some shopping at the Farmers Market which is very close to my residence. 

Once there, I began to experience a feeling of moving slowly in a haze, there appeared to be very little atmospheric clarity around me, as I moved forward from one place to another it was a physical effort, I attempted to block it from my thoughts and simply keep my mind on why I was there in the marketing neighborhood. Since I have resided there for many years, I knew most of the people involved in and even around the various markets and stores.  However, today seemed strangely different, physically it was an effort to move from one place or the other; several people attempted to have a general conversation but I found I heard what they were saying but I seemed to want to escape and not answer except wave or smile and continue on what I felt was the purpose of my journey.

When shopping in one of my favorite markets "Trader Joe's”, I suddenly realized there was definitely something physically wrong with me.  I felt weak and needed to lean on the grocery cart more than ever; after being checked out, I informed one of the managers that I would need them to call a taxi for me because I wasn't feeling well. Of course, they quickly did so and asked if I would want to remain in the store or in front where taxis usually pick up customers. I indicated I would wait with my cart in front for them to come.

Once out there, I felt that everything around me slowly being hazed out, normal sounds of people, cars and other types of auto or machine movement were muffled, my body began to shake, I fought to sustain myself, I even prayed that I would, at least, be able to make it back home. After all, it was only a few blocks from where I was. It was a terrifying feeling to experience such helplessness. Suddenly, I realized I was going down and evidently, I did exactly that, hitting the pavement and the food cart, damaging my front and back shoulder, chest and leg!  However, the rather shocking, unbelievable aspect of this experience was how the people surrounding me lying there waiting for the necessary help, were asking me for my autograph, a few had read my book "Hollywood Through the Back Door" and wanted to know something more about James Dean, a few admitted they enjoyed reading the Canyon News column and wanted me to do more stories about Lady Gaga and Robert Denaro I weakly promised that I would. Finally, the paramedics arrived and pulled off with my lame body, people gathered near the car and actually applauded, and one little lady yelled, "We love ya' Michael, get well!

I thought to myself as I was driven away from the location, "THIS could only happen in Hollywood!"